Nobody Bakes: Skillet Apple Brownies a la Evin

Hi, I'm Nobody.

And this.

This is Evin. (And baby Marian and Pioneer Woman!) That Ree girl keeps some good company. Just sayin'.

So. The other day, as I was roaming listlessly around the Recipe Exchange here on AR, I made a very open recipe request.

'WHAT SHOULD I COOK' I demanded of the sweet and kind ladies that normally reside there.

This was the response from Evin's personal recipes.

Invigorated, I grabbed my skillet!

And threw it into my shamefully crusty oven at 350 degrees.

(I'm sorry I used 'crusty' to describe my oven.)

(I'm sorry my oven is 'crusty'. :<)

Next you need a mixing bowl.

Bonus points if it has a kitschy mushroom motif.

To the bowl, add 1 cup of flour...

And a half cup each of brown and white sugar.

1/4 tsp of salt.

Mental note: Do not pour salt over bowl. Very hard to separate extra salt from white sugar and flour.

Now come the spices! Two teaspoons of cinnamon!

And nutmeg!

These are nutmeg berries that I found at a bulk food store. And they were so weird and shrivelled and weird that I bought them without even knowing exactly what they were.

(I live dangerously like that.)

But as it turns out, you grate these little suckers...

But if you aren't that industrious (or risque!)...

Or if weird little veins inside of shrivelled nut-things freak you out...

This is the perfect solution.

The solution to a food blogger that uses 'crusty', 'shrivelled', and 'nut-things'?

Still working on that.

Moving on...

Add 1 teaspoon nutmeg and 1/2 teaspoon of ground cloves, and give the dry ingredients a quick little stir.

Now grab yourself (teehee) some apples.

I had three slightly worse for wear mcintosh apples.

I only had to peel and chop two of them to get about 2 cups.

You take these and...

Ahem. Excuse me, but you're in the shot.

Could you scooch over just a tad?

Thx.

... add to your dry mixture and toss to coat!

Now you'll need some nut-things. Non-shrivelled variety, please.

(I ate the broken pieces to make this picture pretty. I'm just that committed to excellence. And food. Omnom.)

I gave these a rough chop (even though the recipe didn't say to), and chucked them into the bowl with the apples.

Now rustle up two eggs!

And crack them into a bowl.

Cracked yolk because I'm a spaz and crushed the egg like the Incredible Hulk: Check.

Give those eggs a whisk.

And fetch thee the butter, wench!

I wish I had someone to yell things like that at.

Because then they'd put the butter in a bowl and melt it.

But since neither of us has a kitchen staff, you'll have to do that part yourself.

Once the butter is melted...

... pour it, and what remains of your dignity, onto the table.

After you've scraped as much butter as possible back into the bowl, add a teaspoon of vanilla.

AIMING VERY, VERY CAREFULLY... pour the wet ingredients in with the apple/dry mixture.

Stir just until combined.

Look at how caramel-y colored and delicious this looks. If you want to just eat it now, I give you permission. Unless raw eggs freak you out. Which they probably don't, since you made it past the shrivelled nut-things...

But if you do decide to cook it first.

Fetch thee the skillet from the oven!

Careful, it's hot. (You'd think this would be a no-brainer, but the scar on my right hand proves otherwise.)

You're gunna want about a tablespoon of butter.

Let that melt and give it a little swirl to distribute it evenly over the skillet.

Then find the nearest teenager and bribe it with the first piece of brownie to pose holding the bowl and looking like he's actually helping by placing the batter in the skillet.

After you take a picture, you might want to confiscate the bowl again (because teenage boys most definitely are not freaked out by raw eggs).

I smoothed this out a little before popping it back into the oven for about 20 minutes.

The recipe states 40 minutes, but my oven is an antique freak of nature that is possibly heated by magma from the earth's core. It's just that old.

And then when you pull it from the oven...

And you see the golden, slightly crispy edges...

And you scramble to the cupboard for a knife so you can cut a piece RIGHT NOW...

I don't know about you...

But I heard Etta James.

Aaaaaaaaaaat laaaaaaast....

My loooooove has come along....

My lonely daaays are over....

And life is liiike a sooong...

You need these brownies in your life. Evin commands it. ETTA JAMES commands it.

Ingredients
1 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 cup white sugar
1/2 cup brown sugar
1/4 teaspoon salt
2 tsp cinnamon
1 tsp nutmeg
1/2 tsp cloves
2 cups apple, diced or chopped fine
1/2 cup chopped pecans
1/2 cup butter, melted (no substitutions)
2 eggs, lightly beaten
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 tablespoon butter

Directions
Preheat oven to 350. Place 8 or 9 in cast iron skillet in oven to heat.
In a medium bowl, mix flour, sugars, spices and salt.
Add chopped apples and toss to coat. (Add pecans o.o)
Add butter, extract and beaten eggs, stir to combine.
Place reserved butter into hot skillet, swirl around pan to coat.
When butter in pan is melted, add batter and bake 40 minutes.

I'd love to invite you over for some...